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She was a Certified Public Accountant, and somehow she managed to keep her professional and personal life separate. At least I think she did. We lived in a nice house and always had plenty of stuff. She was an attractive woman, at least in most of my memories; I didn't keep a picture of her. Most of the men she dragged home were neither nice nor attractive. She liked slobs. I never knew who would show up for breakfast, or how many. Most of them scared the shit out of me, or shamed me. I do remember one man who hung around for almost a whole school year. I was in seventh grade and he wasn't a bad male role model. They'd met at a swinger's party and I guess he was okay with a lot of her slut shit, but even he eventually got fed up and split. I was a senior in high school when my mother contracted AIDS.A few weeks after it was confirmed, she committed suicide, or she was murdered. I don't think the cops were ever certain, but I didn't care. I hated her, and I didn't go to her funeral.. Love him.” Before her voice dropped away.I had been trying to remember Gillian before she was transformed into the beautiful woman that she was now. I had a vague recollection of a cute, quiet girl, who been on the periphery for a brief period after I’d first Karen. Was that her? I couldn’t be sure.As I waited, something shifted in me. The more I thought about it, there was just too much about this that I felt uncomfortable about. I was sure there was so much more to this than Gillian was admitting to. My contemplations were interrupted by the voices from the lounge that rose and then finally tailed off. Moments later they returned holding hands. My hackles rose.Karen walked over to me and sat on my lap. “You are my one and only love. I can only do this if you give me your blessing. This is gaining closure for both Jilly and me. I hadn’t realized that I also needed to draw a line under that part of my life until I spoke with her therapist.”I said, “I’m not sure anymore. I always.
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